I have made some difficult decisions this week. I have pressed pause on Lunch Space, a mindfulness group that I founded and that I love. I have also stood down from another organisation where I am a voluntary trustee (I struggled with this one and ran a lot of scenarios which involved people being annoyed with me). After a period of procrastination, I have also made an appointment with a lawyer tomorrow to get the divorce papers signed.
I find making decisions evokes a deep anxiety and have become aware of how much I look to others repeatedly to reassure me that I have made the right decision. Seeking the views of people I trust is valuable. However, really listening to myself is even more valuable.
Whilst reflecting on this, I did some research on indecision and found an article which suggested asking myself "If I didn’t care what anyone thought, what would I do?". The power of this question is based on releasing ourselves from the expectations of other peopl,e which can then help us to get to our true thoughts and feelings about a decision.
Which is what I did and hell yeah, I made some goddamn decisions. #becomingaperson #morehumanhumans #braveasfuck.
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